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The Final Call newspaper conducted a random survey around the country and asked the question, “What do men and women need to know about marriage?” The answers were surprising, profound, typical and humorous. We share the results of our unscientific survey with our readers.

What do men want women to know about marriage?
“Women should marry a man for whom he is, not just a meal ticket, prestige or social standing. Men believe in marriage more than women think. They want families and the benefits of marriage, not just the responsibilities. Women have to help maintain the balance between benefits and responsibilities. If you want to avoid infidelity, have hot monogamy.”

 

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“It’s never going to be easy in a marriage. It’s full of surprises. Stay with your spouse and keep God in the center of what you do.”

 

“There may be an affair. It could happen on either side. The question then becomes, if it does happen, how will you handle it? Will you throw everything away or will you work it out?”

 

“Just because I don’t spend 24 hours in your company doesn’t mean I don’t love you. I will spend time with my friends.”

 

“We are interested in long-term, quality relationships under the right circumstances. People must have energies that compliment each other. Men want women to be their friend and partner, but they also want serious lovers.”

 

“Don’t hold yourself hostage and deny me the pleasure of your company just because you don’t get your way.”

 

“We have to have common interests and do things together. I’ve been happiest with my woman when we were producing something together.”

 

“Regardless of where we are in our development, we want to be respected as men.”

 

“Women need to be prepared for disappointment. Communication is key. Regardless of how you may think I’ll respond, tell me what’s going on. I need to know.”

 

“Don’t tell your friends all of our business. I want to be able to trust you with my emotions, but I can’t when you tell everything I say and do to your miserable friends who want you to be as miserable as they are.”

 

“A wife must become her husband’s best friend. They must develop an intimacy that grows over time. I don’t want to smother her and I don’t want her to smother me, but we need to be close.”

 

“There is power in femininity and power in serving. There is power in a woman who knows how to take care of their husband. As men, we’re looking for something. We have to know what we’re looking for, but it comes as we mature.”

 

“What makes a man want to come home is not just sex. It’s all the things that go on before the sex. We need to know how to care for a woman, but if a woman knows how to really care for a man, she’ll keep him coming home every night.”

 

What do women want men to know about marriage?
“Women expect fidelity. They expect to be treated as an equal partner in regard to financial decisions and help with the up-keep of the house. They want to feel equal, rather than servants. With most women working, men have to understand that women get tired, too.”

 

“Romance should never end. Always keep the newness and freshness in the relationship. Men must invest in the marriage by keeping interesting things going on. Don’t let mundane and regular things interfere with the relationship.”

 

“When you’re married, don’t let your wife lose her soul. Encourage her to be an individual and grow. If you don’t allow her to grow, you’ll make her weaker and cause problems. You want to be equally yoked.”

 

“Marriage is an investment that’s worth something. It’s worth more the longer you work at it. You should be able to look back after 10 years and say, ‘look what we’ve built.'”

 

“I have children. I expect you to love and care for my children as you love and care for me. I don’t want to think of the children as ‘yours’ or ‘mine.'”

 

“Making love to my body gets old. Make love to my mind and the body will follow. I’m so much more than just a bedmate. I want you to get involved with me and my interests. The marriage can’t just be about you and what you want, need or desire. It has to be about what’s best for both of us.”

 

“Let your emotions flow. Your wife likes to hear nice things even if you don’t mean it.  My husband knows how to get what he wants from me. He lies all the time.”

 

“Men have to develop their power by connecting to God. They must empower within themselves the divine order of things. He must realize his need to be loved, adored and obeyed, but also realize subconsciously his responsibility to maintain, secure, provide and develop.”

 

“Women need appreciation. State the obvious. Anything you like that she does, tell her. Whether you are going through good or bad times, let her know that you are happy she is with you. The fact that you like something that she does is powerful.”

 

“Women want to marry someone that is better or at the same level they are financially. She does not expect her life to get worse because she is married to you. Her family doesn’t expect things to get worse, either.”

 

“Women like to be heard. If you are sincerely interested in her, listen to what she has to say. It makes a big difference.”

 

“Men need to know that marriage is a place to be completely safe, but they have to share themselves. Men hide behind an image of who they think they should be. Your wife wants the real you.”